Three Place Settings

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Life with Mom

—-This is a story of a shared life with Mom after her diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease.—

May 8, 2013

During the planning phase of moving to Mom’s, she warned me to not invite her to dinner.   I didn’t really have a response.  I was trying to process her request to figure out why she said that to me.  I never said anything like “Oh, this is going to be so much fun.  We’ll have dinner together every night, and reminisce about old times.”  Maybe she was remembering all the times when my grandmother turned my aunt’s invitations down, and thought there was some life sustaining reason for it.  Maybe she was just not hungry when she made that comment, and thought it was a good ground rule.  She doesn’t even remember saying it.

I never promised that day to not invite her over.  This action (or inaction) left me wide open for generating invitations whenever I wanted.

My mother is a tiny woman.  She wasn’t always so small.  Her weight loss has come along with her memory loss.  I believe it all has something to do with living alone at an older age, in a house and life that was once filled with organized chaos.  I imagine that mood, appetite and maybe memory diminish when you have to rely solely on yourself for fulfilling your life and keeping busy.   So she turned into a tiny woman with no appetite.

I’m glad to say that her appetite has improved in the 2 months we’ve been here.  I think the fact that she’s not alone, that someone else is responsible for the chores that going along with living in a house, and the fact that she accepts my invitations for dinner and togetherness more times than not all have contributed to her slow, but steady desire to eat again.

She thinks she can keep her size 12 pants that she’s had stored away.  I told her that I think it’s OK to donate them, but to maybe hang on to the size 6’s, and we’ll see how it goes.

 

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5 Responses to Three Place Settings

  1. A touching blog, Diane. That togetherness means a lot!

  2. Diane Fiore says:

    You’re so right Jackie. Never turn down an invitation.

  3. Ann Mckinley says:

    You are both have each other.

  4. Ann Mckinley says:

    Oh brother! I MEANT, you are both so lucky to have each other!

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