April 22, 2013
Life with Mom
—-This is a story of a shared life with Mom after her diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease.—
On Saturday, I had a migraine that got away from me. I was so disabled from it that I had to leave my car where I was, and get a ride home. When I got home, I went straight to bed, and slept it off, but not before living through a multitude of horrible thoughts that just kept coming at me, making me feel sicker.
Whenever I have a migraine or a stomach ache, I’m inundated with dreadful thoughts about dying, sickness, loss, and world evil. The world evil thoughts this time were directly related to the Boston tragedy that had gripped us for the preceding several days.
I don’t even think I can describe any of the thoughts now because I’m usually in a semi-conscious state when I’m having them. What I remember clearly, though, is how they make me feel — HOPELESS.
When I regained consciousness after a few hours of sleep, I remembered a story my mother told me about a time when she had 4 little ones, aged 4-8 years old, and was pregnant with the 5th. She was flat on her back feeling miserable with some aliment. My father was working, so she was solely responsible for us all. I asked her how she did it. She said “You just do it. You don’t think of it, you just do what you have to do.”
I know for a fact that I couldn’t have taken care of anyone else on Saturday. I needed to be taken care of myself.
Since I have accepted the responsibility of being my mother’s advocate, adviser, and possible future guider, it’s even more imperative that I keep myself as healthy as possible. I know that there are some things that we have no control over, but there is much we can do to promote our own health and well-being. My pledge to myself and to my family is to preserve wellness to the best of my ability so I can successfully carry out my commitments.
I recovered well enough Saturday to catch a play with my mother called “Our Son’s Wedding” at the Curtain Call Theatre. It was funny and entertaining, and just one of many things I can do for myself on the wellness road.