How We Got Here

Life with Mom

—-This is a story of a shared life with Mom after her diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease.—


When Dad died in 2004, Mom began living alone and carried on well with her life.  We went on a family cruise, she went to Italy 3 times with Brian and I, and we took trips to NYC.

But a few years ago, while thinking of her future and how burdensome living alone can be, I began discussions with her about alternative living situations.  She went along with the idea of possibly moving, saying that anything was possible.  I kept an eye out for a small house or town house in and near my neighborhood.   Her and I also checked out 3-4 senior living apartments.  As I kept the conversation alive, I was slowly realizing that nothing was settling right for her.   She explained in so many words that she just couldn’t fathom breaking down her home and leaving.

I continued to secretly worry how I would manage things for her from a distance if the need arose.  If she had decided on one of the senior living situations, I realized that I would have still worried about how I could be there in a moment’s notice if needed.

So, the next logical thing was to explore adding on to our house to create a space that Mom would feel comfortable and independent in, while being close enough to Brian and I to help her if needed.  This option proved to be financially out of the question.  Done properly, the addition would have cost more than Brain and I paid for the house.

Shortly after exhausting this last possibility, Brian said to me, “We should just move in with your mother.”  I thought he was kidding.  He said he wasn’t.  Then I thought he probably didn’t fully think it out, and would retract his offer in a few days.

So I let a few days go by before checking in with him about this grand offer.  He said he meant it.  I then proposed it to my mother, and she thought it was a great idea.  She thought it was even better when I told her it was Brian’s idea.

Several months later and a serious dose of planning, packing and painting, we’re here with Mom – and her cat and little blind dog.


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5 Responses to How We Got Here

  1. mafarckle says:

    It is wonderful of Brian and you to do this for your mom.  I love the pictures.  Love, MaF


  2. Glynny says:

    Valor is not a term reserved only for our military folks. You and Brian fit the bill in my book.
    God bless,

  3. Ann says:

    Diane and Brian are WAY cool! AND you get a cat in the bargain! SWEET!

  4. Diane Fiore says:

    Ann, The cat keeps trying to get into our living area. He must hear the bark of the dogs?? Can’t figure out his angle, but he sure is cute.

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